Wednesday, Aug 13th Nada

Reading: Same Music: Mostly same, actually Mood: Tired

I still haven't figured out what to do about my long-hiatused online comic [I do know what's going to happen and I've got a lot of funny scenes waiting to be drawn] but since I couldn't bear to look at the layout anymore I changed it. I actually forgot how long any major revamp takes, even if it's not at all fancy, as was the case. Also, apparently it doesn't look quite right in Firefox so unless some of you internet whizes wants to help me with centering table contents in Firefox or if you all finally give up on Firefox and switch to IE [it might suck and not be safe but it works as it should with css!] I'll have to spend more hours on it. Gah.

Monday, Aug 11th "Oh, don't deceive me, oh, never leave me"

Reading: Bruno Bettelheim about fairy tales. I can't help laughing a little about psychoanalysis. Of course, I realize its breakthrough-y importance and I do understand that in an epoch when people agreed to assume that women have no legs discovering sex was a big thing. But like all the enthusiasts they overdid it a little and especially nowadays when sex is everywhere the prophecy-styled psychoanalytical writing must bring a smile. And naturally I'm only saying this because I never dealt with my oedipal issues and whenever I see a carrot I truly realize its fallic importance Music: Nana Mouskouri "Early One Morning." It couldn't be more old-fashioned but I love it lots and lots. I only regret lots and lots that no one, to my knowledge, recorded a rocky version of it. That would be SOOO amazing Mood: Okay

I feel somewhat guilty over the fact that I spent a part of holidays watching all the seasons of "Buffy" that they didn't show here on TV. Seriously, that was a lazefest and they weren't even particularly good. However, as far as endings go, it ended a little better than Angel, as in way more conclusively.

Wednesday, Jul 30th "Your faith was strong but you needed proof"

Reading: Finishing Music: See below Mood: Alright

You know how I think "Hallelujah" is the best song ever written, with breath-takingly incredible lyrics and good melody, with a lot of feeling and just unbelievable a combination of religious imagery and end-of-love story? And with the bitterness? And with every line making you ask "God, how did he come up with this?" Yeah, you know that. Much as I respect Cohen for writing an unbelievable song like that, I think it's covers which underline its greatness. However, if I had any power at all and I could forbid covering one song, it would certainly be the song. There is Buckley's version which is perfect and no other word describes it. There is this version, my newest find, with the strings and as a strings lover I have to appreciate it [they fit the song very oddly but very much] and there's even a Dylan cover. I see no need to harrass perfection any further with Shrek- or American Idol-targeted renditions. So. People. Just stop, okay? You're blaspheming. And in the wrong way.

Sunday, Jul 27th After Holidays

Reading: I managed to read "Mansfield Park," which kept me interested for a while until I figured the ending would be just as banal as I feared. Austen managed to write better female characters when she threw in a vice or two [see Emma or Elisabeth] but this Fanny gal was unbelievably dull - she'd make a great parody of herself if anything amusing happened to her at all - and she only deserved the sickening husband she got. For the other thing see below Music: The most interesting discovery was Bob Geldof, who appears to have a lot of what I like, musically. It was a surprise because before I didn't really know who he was except for a vague idea that he had something to do with U2 [shame shame]. Also, Paganini goes great with nature and birches, which I know because my music player played one Capriccio when I was hammocking underneath birch trees [oh yeah, the impressive intellectual I am I have Paganini on my music player; but only one bit] Mood: Sunny and rested, thankyouverymuch

Yay, the retreat was fun, plenty of badminton and other relaxing goodness. It helped that I love the part of the country where we were staying, with its wild nature and plenty of lakes. I used to spend holidays there every year and it was nice to return. To sum up, we had a great time. And onto the other pressing matter. Since I defended and praised "Gone with the Wind" often enough I feel it only right to share with you my new sensation of shock at its undeniable racism that the current reading brought me. Maybe I overlooked it in my early readings because I was stupid or maybe it was Rhett's charm but most likely that was because I only read translations. To make matters more complicated, I still find it an exquisite book, if very much behind its time where instead of modernist experimentation it offers a grand 19th-century-styled classic novel that Europe had plenty of and the States not so many. While it would benefit from some editing, it still manages to be an epos describing the passing of society as much as it is a romance, cheapened by the popular movie. And the characters are drawn beautifully in all their richness, which I always find the most important aspect of storytelling. But, only white characters. How could an artist of Mitchell's imagination not have even a fraction of it for the black characters? Had she only tried to show the things from a less appallingly-biased perspective she could have written an unsurpassed account of the death of a nation. As it is, she wrote a novel which while gripping makes you writhe uncomfortably and wonder who else you've told that it's your favorite book.

Friday, Jul 18th "Jestem odpadem atomowym"

Reading: "Mansfield Park." It's remarkably devoid of action and full of stiffness but has a strangely mesmerizing effect on me. Only I'm not sure who are the positive characters because those that are supposed to be the good guys are so unbelievably dull that you want to see them torn to pieces Music: Well, last.fm, what did you think. Leonard Cohen radio gives very good results, feel recommended Mood: Really not bad

Tomorrow I'm leaving for a week to take a break from the computer and hopefully play badminton, swim a little and walk in the woods a lot. In the unlikely case you should need me for something, I'll be back next Saturday.

Sunday, Jul 13th "I'm okay most of the time"

Reading: A certain Polish novelist whose pretentious style seems pretty well-crafted for retelling ancient myths, go figure. Also, about Choke it's a less fun Palahniuk. It's as if he's run out of controversial yet picturesque topics [transvestites, sects, terrorists] and had to resolve to also controversial but no-way-lighthearthed themes and his never-changing style can't carry it. To me, it doesn't sound honest anymore Music: My two latest last.fm finds, "I'll Be Your Mirror" by Velvet Underground and Nico [I so love her thick German accent] and "The Apartment Song" by Tom Petty [I'm not a big fan of his but this song rocks] Mood: Alrighty

I had so much fun on Friday. I went to my brother's band rehearsal and they let me play the drums! In case I never bothered you with this confession I'd so love to play the drums but of course I have neither time nor money to try it. But it feels just as cool and natural as I always imagined. I get the biggest kick out of the fact that you hit the right part of the instrument and it sounds the right way: what a change from the guitar-learning torture where, try as you might, it never sounds right because your nails are always too long to press the strings properly. Yeah, okay, MY nails.

Wednesday, Jul 9th "You told me again you preferred handsome men"

Reading: Mostly HTML code for the last few hours. Have I ever actually told you that I code my website and not use some fancy shmancy thing like Dreamweaver? Yeah, I do, with Notepad. Am I nerdy or what Music: Mostly the same, with some last.fm thrown in for a good measure. Interestingly enough, entering Patti Smith gives more interesting results than entering Bob Dylan. Or maybe punk is more versatile than folk. That didn't sound too convincing, did it Mood: Gah, tired

Yay, the portfolio is updated. It's obviously not all the new work I have but it's all I had on my hard drive ready for editing. Well, and all which I wanted to share. No drawings/paintings yet but maybe I'll get down to it some day. Anyway, enjoy.

Tuesday, Jul 8th "And you really should know better/ 'Cause she's worth a whole lot more"

Reading: Finishing "Choke." It's good but if you read any other Palahniuk you don't really HAVE to read this one Music: Buffalo Springfield, thanks R. I'm really enjoying it, too. I wonder how the wonders of BS [no, it really means Buffalo Springfield, why?] eluded me so long Mood: Fine, fine

I'm not delusional enough to think people really care but, care or not, an unreasonably huge chunk of updatification is coming soon.

Sunday, Jul 6th "Who's saying baby, that don't mean a thing"

Reading: Palahniuk and Mitchell Music: Last.fm reminded me of/introduced me to a few interesting things, including Cat Stevens and Melanie Mood: Fine

One undoubtedly good thing about summer is ice-cream. Man, how could I forget over the winter months how much I LOVE ice-cream? Also, I've cut my hair and while it's one of my favorite haircuts, I had to listen to a few unpleasant things from a certain person, which was, well, unpleasant. So if you're feeling generous you might as well write to me and tell me that you think I look... well, I'll settle for nice. Pretty please? [And yeah, I know the colors are all messed up but I meant those for grayscale images. Only I like the red lipstick too much.]